I have a few memories of special gifts received at Christmas. My brother and I woke up one Christmas morning to brand new Schwinn bikes: mine a shiny red five-speed and his a special edition red, white, and blue ten-speed. And one year I received a brown leather Thompson Chain Reference Bible (“Christmas 1982” is written inside the front cover). It is a gift I still use on a regular basis! But the best gift was an engagement ring in 1988. Nothing has surpassed the joy of that Christmas gift! It wasn’t an elaborate proposal; it didn’t need to be. It was simply a beautiful ring tied to the zipper of a Seattle Pacific University sweatshirt.

But my favorite memories of the season are not of gifts but rather the time spent with the givers and receivers of gifts. The engagement ring and wedding band is still on my finger thirty-five Christmases later, but the ring is only a symbol of the relationship. There are too many beautiful Christmas memories with my husband to even begin to pick a favorite.

Another of my favorite Christmas memories was the tradition of Christmas shopping and dinner with my dad. He never knew what to get for my mom, so he’d take me with him to help pick out her gifts. Actually, he always had a pretty good idea, and I think he could have done it by himself. But that would not have been nearly as much fun as our date night in the middle of a busy season. It was a night he took me to dinner and talked about life. My dad always has a story to tell or a bit of random information about how something works, but these nights were different. It was kind of like the yearly checkup to make sure everything was good.

At the same time, I am old enough to know that not all Christmas seasons are filled with fond memories. Like the year a chimney fire got away and burned a portion of my grandparents’ house on Christmas morning. I still remember watching the flames shoot up through the roof while crying with my family. But by far the worst Christmas was when my grandma passed away on Christmas Eve. We still had Christmas for the little kids, but no one felt like celebrating that year.

Why am I sharing this? (Sorry, mom, I know I made you cry.) I think it is important that we learn from Mary on the night Jesus was born. After giving birth in the stable, away from home, and a visit from smelly shepherds she didn’t know, the Bible says Mary “treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart” (Luke 2:19, NIV). In the hustle and bustle of trying to learn to nurse a newborn and figure out what to use for a diaper, Luke tells us that Mary valued and appreciated the moment. She took time to reflect on and consider the significance of all that had happened.

What about us? Are we taking the time to appreciate the moments we spend with our loved ones? Don’t get so caught up in all the things of Christmas that we miss the “being” of Christmas. The decor around us touting the “love,” “joy,” “peace,” and “hope” of Christmas are not feelings. They are choices to stop and experience them.

Let’s have a Mary Christmas this year and choose to treasure the things we already have in this season of Merry Christmas.